A beginning?

So where to start?

I guess I should make it clear right at the start that this is not a blog encouraged by any resolutions left over from the New Year. Far from it in fact. All resolutions have been suitably considered, agreed and then discarded by now. But anyone noticing the date on this first post will understandably assume otherwise.

So what is this all about?

I guess it will become clearer with each post but this is something I have been planning to do for a while now.

In October 2014 my wife was diagnosed with cancer. Surgery, radiotherapy, chemotherapy all followed. Last month, in December 2016 she was diagnosed with a different kind of cancer.

Further treatment, more surgery (with more to come) and an almost endless stream of hospital appointments suitably re-appeared.

But one thing didn’t appear.

No one was able to provide me with a handbook on how to cope with your wife getting ill. Well, of course there were leaflets and all kinds of handouts provided by all kinds of well meaning people and hospitals and doctors. And no doubt there are plenty of people who have documented their thoughts about what to do in similar circumstances. But I just couldn’t find anyone who was able to tell me that they had been through it before or was able to describe what it would feel like and, more importantly, how to cope with someone who keeps thinking they are about to die.

And secondly, it was also about what disappeared. A sense of happiness. With the occasional appearance of a certain kind of hysterical black humour excepted, a feeling of fun or laughter or joy suddenly because elusive.

I can hear you saying, no great surprise really, and you would be right.

I don’t want to write a handbook for men who have wives who get ill. I don’t want to write a cancer sufferers joke book. In fact, as I suggested earlier, I have been putting this off for over two years since the thought first crossed my mind. After all, it’s hardly the sort of thing anyone would chose to read unless, well, unless you found yourself in a similar situation I guess.

But I wanted to see if I could make some kind of concerted effort to bring humour, fun and plenty of kindness into a difficult situation. I wanted to see if we could find a new focus and to put a smile on the face of my wife and to maybe, just maybe, release some of the stress and pressure that has been sitting over me for a little over two years. So perhaps this is all about searching for the elusive sense of happiness at a time when it is most needed.

And here I am. I am hoping that health wise things will improve. Of course I do. But I am also hoping that maybe we can have a little fun and a bloody good laugh along the way.

So this may be worth reading. It may not. I don’t care all that much to be honest (sorry) but I am going to do it anyway. So, anyone know a good joke?